- Sit somewhere quiet.
- Set a timer for 15 minutes.
- Start breathing a little faster than normal, but at a steady pace.
- Breath with deep breaths into the belly. Fill the belly with air as low in your body as you can. Breath in and out from this spot purposely for the duration of this process. If you forget to do this, that's fine, just start again.
- Feel the emotion or emotions happening for you. Let them come. For just a few minutes today, you are going to welcome your experience.
- As the emotion happens, find the physical sensations of it. Where is it in the body? Does it feel hard or soft? Is it hot? Is it trembling? Is it tight? Do not try to analyze anything. You may have thoughts about the emotion or thoughts about what you should do to "fix" the situation. You can't fix it. Ignore these thoughts. You may have thoughts that say you should not or don't have to feel what you are feeling. Ignore these thoughts. Focus entirely on the physical sensations. Address your emotions as the physical sensations. Put your awareness into the physical sensations and find out what they are. You can even use your mind to describe them out loud.
- Let them get stronger. Invite the physical sensations to come. This is your actual felt experience of the emotion and you can handle the physical sensations. They are actually much easier to handle than thoughts most of the time. You do not have to know what the emotion even is or why it is happening. Very often those insights will come automatically. You might see visions or hear words from your emotions. You don't have to look for these. Just stay focused on the physical sensations and keep belly breathing.
- Relax into these sensations and surrender to your body. Don't try to change these sensations. Just surrender. Just put your awareness on the physical sensations and stop trying to resist anything. Let them happen fully. Let your body have control. Let it do whatever it wants. Stand, bend over, lie down, shake, hum, make noise, cry, laugh, scream, squirm on the floor, twist and turn, curl into a ball, shake your hands, stomp, punch (a pillow). Most of the time I do this process sitting and my body releases the emotion by crying. Sometimes, for really strong emotions I am lying down and shaking quite a bit and also crying to release. Sometimes with anger I need to punch pillows or flex my lower abs very hard several times, and I will have a release. There is nothing wrong with any of this. There is nothing wrong happening. All of this body activity is your cells naturally moving the old stuck energy and releasing. Let them do it.
- Keep belly breathing. All the time. Keep belly breathing and focusing on the body sensations. Most likely they will come in waves. They will build up and it will seem hard to handle. Your mind will try to escape. It will try to distract you. That's okay. Whatever you see in the mind is okay. Just keep relaxing into the physical sensations and surrendering to the body. This is your body trying to heal. The wave of sensation might build up until it breaks with you crying or some other release. Then the sensations will subside and you might feel relief or peace. And then another wave might come. Or that particular disturbance might be done, forever. Huzzah!
- The timer will go off in 15 minutes and you are done. That's it. No need to force yourself. 15 minutes is enough. You can do it for 15 minutes. You don't have to "finish" any emotions. Every moment you are surrendering in this way is clearing space inside you. You might find, however, once you learn how energy moves through you and once you encounter the peace and relief on the other side of your emotions, you might want to continue this process until the waves are complete. You might find it is actually easy to let these waves pass through. And then they are done, and the emotion is gone. You might find you actually enjoy it. You might be amazed at what happens in your thinking and life.
What is actually happening in this process? You are surrendering to what the Universe is asking you to look at. You are surrendering to the energy that needs to move through your body.
When you give these hurts parts of you full awareness and acceptance you reconnect them with your love. You are welcoming them and embracing them, and letting them come through you, and this heals it! Emotional surrender lets healing happen. Your body knows what to do, we are just restricting it almost all the time. Give your body the gift of freedom, just for a few minutes today.
If you want to be a little more active with your mind in this process, you can consciously imagine dropping your defenses, opening your heart, and you can literally invite the sensations, emotions, and energy through your heart. I like this too. It's like, "welcome hurt parts, old friends, you did some difficult work feeling all this pain, it's time to come home."